FRIENDS!!! What is a friend? What kind of friend are you? Are we genuine? Are we authentic? Are we true? Are we real? Are we sincere? Are we supportive? Are we stretching the truth in order to protect a friend? Do we have courage to tell the truth but show respect and honesty towards our friends? How real are you in dealing with your friends? Are we wearing mask and pretending to be someone and act as if everything is rosy in our lives? These attitudes are the death of real, true and genuine and authentic friendship. And i don't really like that kind of friendships. We tend to use darkness to hide our hurts, faults, fears, failures, and flaws.
If you love somebody, what you long for more than anything else is that person’s presence with you. Photos are a comfort. Telephone calls, emails and texts are nice. Letters are good. Skype and FaceTime iMessages, Messenger, are great ways to communicate. Yet nothing can compare and beat to actually spending time with them in person.
Loneliness is everywhere. Many people feel cut off and alienated from others. Being in a crowd just makes people more aware of their isolation. We all need friends who will stick close,listen,care and offer help when it is needed-in good times and bad. It is better to have one such friend than dozens of superficial acquaintances. But instead of wishing we could find true friend,seek to become one. There are people who need our friendship. Ask God to reveal them to us then take on the challenge of being a true, genuine and authentic friend.
We need friends in our lives. I don’t just mean friends who makes us laugh or smile, but friends who love us enough to share what God is doing in our lives and who are willing to share correction with us and vice versa. The Bible says “iron sharpens iron”. True friends will correct us if needed. Proverbs 27:5 says, “Better an open rebuke than hidden love.” Friends won’t let us injure ourselves or others if they can intervene. They won’t remain silent with what we need to hear – and it will be shared in the deepest of love.
True friendship forgives when needed, and loving each other even when it hurts. A true friendship isn’t one-sided. Both friends are willing to lay down their life for the other. Grace is freely and generously given.We need friends who will help us grow to be more like Christ.
I was reminded of my blog months ago regarding authentic friendship.
Authentic friendships are more than superficial, surface-level chit-chat. They involve genuine, heart-to-heart, sometimes gut-level, sharing. And it's hard to find. It's rare. Being authentic requires both courage and humility. It means facing our fear of exposure, rejection, and being hurt again. Why would anyone take such a risk? Because it is the only way to grow spiritually and be emotionally healthy. We only grow by taking risks, and the most difficult risk of all is to be honest with ourselves and with others. It's only as we become open about our lives that we experience authentic, honest, true and genunine friendship.
In authentic friendship mutuality is the art of giving and receiving. It’s depending on each other. The way God designed our bodies is a model for understanding our lives together, every part dependent on every other part.”Mutuality is sharing responsibilities, and helping each other, mutual accountability, mutual encouragement, mutual serving, and mutual honoring. These friendships develop when we get honest about who we are and what is happening in our lives. They develop when we share our hurts, reveal our feelings, confess our failures, disclose our doubts, admit our fears, acknowledge our weaknesses, accept one another's weaknesses and ask for help and prayer.
In authentic friendship we experience sympathy. Sympathy is not giving advice or offering quick, cosmetic help; sympathy is entering in and sharing the pain of each other. Sympathy says, “I understand what we’re going through, and what we feel is neither strange nor crazy.” Today some call this “empathy,” but the biblical word is “sympathy.” The Bible says,. . be sympathetic, kind, humble, gentle, and patient.”Sympathy meets two fundamental human needs: the need to be understood and the need to have our feelings validated. Every time we understand and affirm someone’s feelings, we build authentic relationship. The problem is that we are often in so much of a hurry to fix things that we don’t have time to sympathize with people. Or we’re preoccupied with our own hurts. Self-pity dries up sympathy for others.
There is a vast difference between knowing someone well and being a true, honest, real, genuine and authentic friend. The greatest evidence of a geniune friendship is loyalty (loving "at all times"). A true friend loves at all times. Regardless of what you do, what happens, or where life takes you, a true friend loves at all times. On your worst day – when you aren’t even fun to be around – a true friend still takes you out. Being available to help in times of distress or personal struggles. True friends are in it for the long haul. Even when you’ve fallen – or agree and disagree with you completely – a true friend is in your corner. When you call – even when you’re in trouble – they come. But, if we run into each other again we pick up where we left off. Trust is already established. The relationship is just as strong. True friendships are consistent. A true friendship makes you a better person.
Too many people are fair-weather friends. They stick around when the friendship helps them and leave when they're not getting anything out of the relationship. Think of our friends and assess our loyalty to them. Be the kind of true, honest, genuine and authentic friend.
An honest answer is like a kiss of friendship. (NLT) ( Proverbs 24:26 )
A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. - Proverbs 17:17
A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. - Proverbs 18:24
